Tag Archives: loneliness

Words and More Words

I often find myself participating in conversations wondering what the point of all of it is.  Sometimes words and phrases just seem like trivial mouth sounds put forth as a desperate plea for the silence to stop. “Oh, you like blue?  …How interesting! … Continue reading

Posted in Editorial | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

The Chicken Dance: a pathetic tale of melancholic self-pity

I’ve learned in recent years that if I want to do something, I can’t be afraid of doing it alone.  If I always waited around for people to join me, I’d still be waiting.  I can’t let the lameness of … Continue reading

Posted in Autobiography | Tagged , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

The Worst Lesson I Ever Learned

Let me tell you the 2nd worst lesson I ever learned: Good things come to those who wait. Truth be told, those who wait may wait forever.  Good Fortune is not seeking you out.  It isn’t even waiting to be … Continue reading

Posted in Autobiography | Tagged , , , , | 6 Comments

The Foolish Destiny of a Delusional Egomaniac: i.e. The Art of Denial

I am unfit for companionship. It’s not that I’m terribly unattractive – I have two eyes, teeth which point roughly in the right direction, and I smell okay on most weekdays – it’s just that somehow, somewhere in my past, … Continue reading

Posted in Autobiography, Editorial | Tagged , , , , | 5 Comments

Camping Alone Sucks

I have come to learn: there are things I will never enjoy doing no matter how much I want to enjoy doing them. I speak of camping alone. I can’t deny there is a certain amount of appeal to the … Continue reading

Posted in Editorial | Tagged , , , , | 8 Comments

A Quack’s Quick Guide: How to Objectify Women

We’ve all been there: you’re at a party and your coworker points to a young lady across the room, leans over to you, and says, “Nice tits.” It makes you a little uncomfortable. Like any decent human being, you realize … Continue reading

Posted in Nonsense | Tagged , , | 11 Comments